Seek justice, love mercy, walk humbly before your God...
My employment is being an attorney. This always surprises people. They have never met a poor lawyer...it is amusing to watch people register this fact about me. I am SO NOT the typical attorney at law.
I went to law school with the lofty idea of helping people. My calling came out of Proverbs 31:8&9. "Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves; ensure justice for those who are perishing. Yes, speak up for the poor and helpless, and see that they get justice."
I am ashamed to say - that I lost track of this calling at points in my career - the lure of money and influence often clouded my mission to seek justice for the poor and helpless. Let me be clear, there is nothing wrong with making a good living and influencing your profession - these are noble pursuits when coupled with God's will. But my call is different...on and off for 10 years I have struggled with the drive to be the best - make the most - make a name for myself AND the alternative voice - seek justice for those who cannot speak for themselves.
I am thankful that I serve a patient Father who gently guides me back to His plan for my life. I am now working as a children services attorney in the poorest county in the State of Ohio. I don't have an assistant or a plush office space - no one brings me coffee or goes to pick up my lunch (I would so love this!!). But I work with the most amazing, committed people I have ever met.
This week I had a trial - I cannot give the details, but, seriously, it was the most rewarding thing I have ever been a part of...I watched love and truth overcome serious evil. I do have a dramatic bend...but I am not exaggerating in this case. I have never been more fulfilled in my work than I am right now! I had the opportunity to assist in giving the helpless a chance to speak up for themselves - to fulfill the exact call on my life. Praise be to God. He is the giver of good gifts.
IT IS WORTH IT! Following the Father's voice is worth it. I am posting this on my blog so when the dark times come - I can read it and remember, remember His goodness.
I will hold my head high as I clip coupons, barter for car repairs, and shop discount stores. I will shine up my 10 yr old car and tell anyone who will listen of His goodness and mercy. I will begin to try to love this single wide trailer and the freedom it has given me to find this gift of obedience.
Happy weekend, friends. May you find the same gift of fulfillment in your daily lives. May your days, even when they seem mundane, bring the Father glory!
Friday, April 27, 2012
Monday, April 23, 2012
After a six month hiatus...
I have decided to reboot the old blog. Yes, we are still living in our single wide trailer, and yes there are still bugs and mice...less though - we are becoming avid warriors!
I have been amazed at how my flesh has continued to struggle with this transition. How changing our societal status by choice has been so unsettling. So much of my identity was wrapped up in my job and our home. I didn't make much money and had a very simple, conservative home - however we were still "acceptable" because we were somewhat "normal".
Being poor, or identified as poor, by choice is sincerely uncomfortable for everyone concerned. Don't you have any drive? Don't you have goals for your future? And the zinger for me, "How will this effect your children?" People we love so much, do not understand our choice. Hell - most days I don't understand our choice - but one thing is sure...I am not spending the next 38 years climbing an invisible ladder that leads to self-centered, self-righteous living.
Mike has started looking for additional part time work - even though he puts in more than 40 hours a week at a job that is not valued by our society and therefore, does not pay. He has endured harsh criticism by the well meaning, and has been virtually ignored by those we thought would help. No, this not the ramblings of a bitter wife - just someone who is once again counting the cost.
We continue to slug it out because our hearts have been stirred by the Father. It is so vital that I remember what got us here. Selfish motives on my part in some ways...less stress, less bills, more time to be a mom...
And now that it is hard - harder than I ever imagined, why are we here? Was this just a mid-life mis-step? No. I still believe that God moved our hearts through His Word, our trusted pastors and my trip to Ethiopia. I still believe we serve a God that is heart broken for the broken and the poor. And more than ever, I believe the Father reveals Himself in the struggle.
I find peace in knowing that I am engaged in the struggle to know Him and advance His love. My sister sent me a text the other day reminding me of the final verse shared by our Dad on his last Sunday before he died - Joshua 1:9 - Be strong and courageous...
I will continue forward with courage, in our single wide trailer - I will answer the strange looks and judging spirits with compassion and view it as an opportunity to share how close the Father is to the struggle...
I will continue to fight the fear that chases me with strength and confidence in the One who calls my family out from among the normal to experience Him in a different way. His Words will be my battle cry to the enemy...we will not stop, we will not falter - I will not be moved.
Your prayers are so appreciated. I pray many blessings on you and yours.
I have been amazed at how my flesh has continued to struggle with this transition. How changing our societal status by choice has been so unsettling. So much of my identity was wrapped up in my job and our home. I didn't make much money and had a very simple, conservative home - however we were still "acceptable" because we were somewhat "normal".
Being poor, or identified as poor, by choice is sincerely uncomfortable for everyone concerned. Don't you have any drive? Don't you have goals for your future? And the zinger for me, "How will this effect your children?" People we love so much, do not understand our choice. Hell - most days I don't understand our choice - but one thing is sure...I am not spending the next 38 years climbing an invisible ladder that leads to self-centered, self-righteous living.
Mike has started looking for additional part time work - even though he puts in more than 40 hours a week at a job that is not valued by our society and therefore, does not pay. He has endured harsh criticism by the well meaning, and has been virtually ignored by those we thought would help. No, this not the ramblings of a bitter wife - just someone who is once again counting the cost.
We continue to slug it out because our hearts have been stirred by the Father. It is so vital that I remember what got us here. Selfish motives on my part in some ways...less stress, less bills, more time to be a mom...
And now that it is hard - harder than I ever imagined, why are we here? Was this just a mid-life mis-step? No. I still believe that God moved our hearts through His Word, our trusted pastors and my trip to Ethiopia. I still believe we serve a God that is heart broken for the broken and the poor. And more than ever, I believe the Father reveals Himself in the struggle.
I find peace in knowing that I am engaged in the struggle to know Him and advance His love. My sister sent me a text the other day reminding me of the final verse shared by our Dad on his last Sunday before he died - Joshua 1:9 - Be strong and courageous...
I will continue forward with courage, in our single wide trailer - I will answer the strange looks and judging spirits with compassion and view it as an opportunity to share how close the Father is to the struggle...
I will continue to fight the fear that chases me with strength and confidence in the One who calls my family out from among the normal to experience Him in a different way. His Words will be my battle cry to the enemy...we will not stop, we will not falter - I will not be moved.
Your prayers are so appreciated. I pray many blessings on you and yours.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)